What? He's posting again?

Hey there,

It's been a odd little while. I know that I should write more in here, but I've been up to my ears in grad school stuff and I can't in good conscience keep this up when I'm suppose to be planning out the next few years of my life. (It is really weird to realize that the stuff I'm doing right now will be determining what and where I will be doing stuff for the next few years. That's always the case though.)

Senior year right? It's the point where everything comes to a close somewhat. I've got two last fencing tournaments as a college kid. (There is no way in the seven hells that I'll travel for fencing in grad school. They can't make me.) Then I give up my squad to the kids I've been helping raise for four years. It's an odd feeling that I really am not use to. I'm trying to plan who will be in charge and who will support them, but it's really futile trying to plan stuff that will happen naturally. They will be fine (I hope) and there is nothing new that I can really do, other than what I have been doing.

I know my lab managers are starting to realize that I'm not going to be around for much longer. They're trying to get me to teach the younger kids how to properly do my job. (Which is a lot. I've been working there for almost four years, and I can single-handedly run the general lab stuff if I need to, which is no small feat. Also really exhausting.) They've got a few good kids, but research labs are always places of high turnovers. Between the grad students, the undergrads, and the post-docs, there is really very little staff that has the intention of staying there for more than a few years. It's a weird feeling that there will only be two people left working in the lab that were there before me when I leave. Strange feelings.

Finally, one thing that I can actually start doing again is writing. You guys probably don't read this for my opinions on the fencing community (of which I'm effectively just some kid in the backwaters of the country) or the research community (of which I am just a mouth-breathing undergrad aspiring greatness), but maybe you guys are here for the writing and my charming personality? I thought not, but I will pretend that's the reason. I've done some dialog and some setting description, but I've only just started drafting stuff again. Which of course comes down the the great topic of anxiety and strife for me around this time of year: Clarion.

Two stories, a few things about myself, and a hope or prayer that will whisk me off to California for a summer of highly intensive and formative short story drafting. It's an odd thought that I might be able to do it this time. Second year of applying, but that's nothing when I talk to people that tried futilely for six years to get in only to suddenly break through. I've got Socks, one story from last time I tried applying, published and am very proud of her. My other story from last years submission has been around the stocks a few times with little success, and though I love it dearly I think that I will try something new. I've got a short little 800 word prompt that I think has a lot of potential... I just have to expand it to a normal length and make sure it's not too complex.

That is mostly my goal for the rest of the month: polish this story until it shines. I think that it is a reasonable goal and I think it will move smoothly. I'll also polish some other drafts and take them out to a few markets while I'm waiting for Clarion to get back to me. Tell you guys what, if I have any stubs or starts that just aren't clicking for larger work but I still like them, I'll post them for your enjoyment. I've got a few NaNoWriMo things that never quite got off the ground and would be fun to post, but we'll see.

For the moment: Clarion.
All other things come second, at least for the month.

Good talking to you guys again.
I'll see you around some time, but I wouldn't be too surprised if I get all worked up into whatever project I've holed myself into.

Yours,
Patrick